Friday, April 11, 2014

Marriage Should Be Fun

One of the books I read while we were on vacation was Mindy Kaling's Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? The book has been on my "to read" list for a while now and it seemed like the perfect, fun poolside read.

In a section of the book, Mindy approaches the subject of love and marriage:

"I don't want to hear about the endless struggles to keep sex exciting, or the work it takes to plan a date night. I want to hear that you guys watch every episode of The Bachelorette together in secret shame, or that one got the other hooked on Breaking Bad and if either watches it without the other, they're dead meat. I want to see you guys high-five each other like teammates on a recreational softball team you both do for fun. I want to hear about it because I know it's possible, and because I want it for myself."

Her thoughts really resonated with me as she continued to explain in much more detail how so many married people complain and make it sound like marriage is no fun - she even makes the point that all her divorced friends seem happier than those who are married.

While marriage isn't always easy (doing life with someone takes love, practice, and patience), I agree with Mindy that the institution of marriage seems to have a bad reputation. Though, I do think Hollywood, with its quick celebrity marriages and penchant for portraying unhappy unions on film, might be largely responsible for this negative spin on marriage.

Anyway, Mindy's words have stuck in my head because her explanation of what marriage should be - pals who truly enjoy one another's company - is the marriage that I feel blessed to have. A union where you cheer each other on, where you want to have fun together, where you want to spend time together - that union exists and it's special and it should be honored and cherished.

"Married people, it's up to you. It's entirely on your shoulders to keep this sinking institution afloat. It's a stately old ship, and a lot of people, like me, want to get on board. Please be psyched, and convey that psychedness to us. And always remember: so many, many people are envious of what you have..."

She's right. Us married folks do have a responsibility to upkeep the institution of marriage - to share how fun marriage is, and to not take it for granted that we've found that person to have a lifetime of fun with. So this is me, doing my part: marriage is cool and I'm psyched that I get to do life with Taras. We're lucky to have found each other, and I don't take that for granted.

Have a good weekend, friends!

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